The Morning Routine of Taylor Swift, Probably

6:00AM: Taylor’s cat, Detective Olivia Benson Swift, summons her for her morning stretches and meditation.

6:30AM: Ellen Pompeo arrives for Taylor’s morning checkup. Ellen pleads that she is not an actual doctor, she just plays one on Grey’s Anatomy, but Taylor refuses to accept her petty excuses. Ellen performs emergency surgery on the paper cut Taylor got while cutting out Ina Garten recipes.

7:00AM: Taylor eats breakfast with her cats, who sit with her at her kitchen table, obviously. She eats three Low Fat Frosted Strawberry Poptarts. No more, no less.

8:03AM: Taylor gets ready for her day whilst blasting Beyoncé’s “Flawless on surround sound throughout her apartment. She chants “BOW DOWN, BITCHES!!!” from the windows, and her screams reach every square inch of New York City.

8:40AM: Karlie Kloss models her potential outfit choices for her on a rotating, circular stage while Taylor sits in a massage chair and takes notes on the influence of her crop top choices on the general public.

9:13AM: Taylor calls her publicist to let her know that she will need medical staff at all of her shows because some of her fans may not make it through her performance of “Bad Blood.” Her publicist agrees immediately.

9:18AM: Taylor drinks a Skinny Vanilla Latte from Starbucks, which is delivered to her by carrier owl every morning. Her carrier owl is Hedwig, who never actually died in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Taylor paid off J.K. Rowling to ensure that she could use him for her own personal coffee needs.

9:36AM: Her advisory board gathers in her living room to vote on which fans Taylor will send care packages to next. Lena Dunham suggests that Taylor waits until Christmas because there are no more holidays coming up. Taylor presses a button and Lena falls through a trap door. Ellen Degeneres cowers in the corner.

10:00AM: Taylor sits in front of her television, tears flowing down her face as she watches the Derek Shepherd montage from Grey’s Anatomy. She must watch this every morning so that she can never forget the tragic breaking of #TeamMerDer. She deletes Shonda Rhimes’s number from her iPhone.

10:27AM: Taylor sips a Diet Coke with a straw and works on the opening monologue for her upcoming world tour. In the monologue, she will remind everyone that it is indeed a world tour because her influence knows no limits.

11:00AM: Taylor’s security team arrives and they head out the door together to a flock of paparazzi. She smiles at them and steps into her Escalade, where a bottle of SmartWater has been properly chilled to a temperature of 35 degrees.

This post was inspired by Matt Bellassai’s post on


Spring Makeup

What’s that I hear? Spring is here? The sun is shining? Well…. I mean the sun pretty much shines all-year-round in California but I’ve heard that it has started shining in other parts of the world as well, so this post seemed warranted. Let’s go over some of my favorite Spring makeup, shall we?

As far as skin creams go, I’ve been reaching for the It Cosmetics Your Skin But Better CC Cream a lot recently. It’s pretty much a star product: full coverage, SPF 50+, anti-aging technology, etc. I wear the shade Fair and it matches me perfectly. It has a super thick consistency, but is really creamy and easy to blend. I just use my fingers to blend it all over my face like a moisturizer and it lasts all day.

A new product that I am ob-sessed with is Revlon’s Highlighting Palette in Rose Glow. It adds the most gorgeous shimmer without being too overpowering. I like to layer it over a matte blush to give my cheeks that extra glow. They also have a bronze version which I think would look stunning if you have a tan.

As for my favorite blushes for this time of year, I’ve got to start with Dollface by Tarte. It’s the circular one that I’ve hit pan & broken the lid off of in the picture above. So yeah, I guess you could say it’s well loved. A more budget-friendly blush that I adore is Covergirl Peaches. It’s a warmer pink tone than Dollface and it really warms up your face.

In the realms of Spring nail polish, I could not go without Addison by Zoya. It’s the most hassle-free, natural color, and the formula just melts into your nails. At least it pretty much feels like that. It’s a mauve-y pink color that looks good on everyone. They sell Zoya at Whole Foods, by the way! Asparagus with a side of nail polish, anyone?


The Walls Around Us by Nova Ren Suma

If you’re anything like me, first thing you’ll notice about this book is the all-consuming way that Nova Ren Suma writes. You’ll be completely drawn into the story line and the characters by the end of the first chapter even though you’ll have absolutely no idea what is going on. I’m attributing this to the fact that it’s written very stream of conscious-y so it’s like you’re inside the minds of the characters and feeling those same emotions that they feel.

Violet and Orianna are high schoolers, ballerinas and best friends. And they are destined for greatness. Well, they were destined for greatness until Orianna gets sent off to prison for something that happened in the tunnel behind the theater. The story is told through two differents viewpoints – one portion is told by Violet, who is set to start her freshman year at Julliard in just a couple of weeks, and the other portion is told by Amber, a prisoner at the Aurora Hills juvenile detention center who has been locked up since she was 13.

The Walls Around Us is a book where you don’t find out all of the details all at once – they are given to you crumb by crumb over the course of the book, and then when you finally put all the pieces together, you realize just how creepy & twisted the story is. What really happened in that tunnel that night? And how did two teenage girls get so mixed up in the crime of the century?


Rompers That Belong In Your Closet

Sometimes you just need to listen to ‘Helluva Life’ by Frankie Ballard on repeat while driving aimlessly until you finally understand that it is a helluva life and that you are a person and that you do matter and that you can live a life you’re proud of. Sometimes that just needs to happen. Other things that need to happen? ROMPER COLLAGES. And an in-depth analysis of the new emoji keyboard. But mostly romper collages. If you have not yet experienced the glorious nature of rompers, you are about to see the light. The light of an outfit that completes itself. The sheer glory of an outfit that you can just throw on and not worry about if the color of your denim jeans matching the undertones of your shirt. I’m talking life-changing things here, people. Life-changing.

If you want specific links, let me know, but these rompers in particular are from Show Me Your MuMu, Nordstrom, DailyLook, and NastyGal!

Have you jumped on the romper train yet? Are you just as obsessed as I am?


Sephora VIB Sale!

Sephora is one of those places that has a solution for every problem you’ve ever had and then a separate selection of products right by the register for problems that you didn’t know you had but that you can easily convince yourself that need to fix. You need to know exactly what you’re looking for when you step foot through those doors or else you will end up with five too many things in your hands at the register. It’s the Target of makeup. AND THE VIB SALE HAS OFFICIALLY STARTED! 15% off for all VIB members. So, if you are a VIB, this post is for you. If not, hopefully you can get some beauty inspiration from these picks!

  1. Laura Mercier Silk Crème Moisturizing Photo Edition Foundation – This is the newest launch from Laura Mercier, and I have heard excellent things about it. One to check out if you’re looking for a new foundation!
  2. Tarte Airbrush Finish Bamboo Foundation Brush – All I’m saying is that supermodel Gigi Hadid uses this brush… and isn’t that reason enough to invest?
  3. Tarte Tartelette Amazonian Clay Matte Eyeshadow Palette – There’s really not that many matte eyeshadow palettes out there, which is why this new one from Tarte is selling so well. A really good one to add to your collection if you are an eyeshadow fanatic.
  4. First Aid Beauty Ultra Repair Cream – I’ve tried this moisturizer, and it is basically a large drink of hydration for your face. For those of you with intensely dry skin, definitely check this out.
  5. Becca Shimmering Skin Perfector – Just in case you want to look like a glowing goddess on a daily basis.
  6. Hourglass Ambient Bronzer – Hourglass is one of those over-hyped brands that has a cult following. But from what I’ve heard, it’s worth the hype. Their newest release is one to check out if you’re on the market for a new bronzer.
  7. NARS Pure Radiant Tinted Moisturizer – NARS just released a new foundation, but if you’re looking for a more natural product, this fan-favorite tinted moisturizer belongs in your shopping bag.
  8. Too Faced Chocolate Bar Palette – This is a great all-in-one palette that works for day and night looks. From what I’ve heard, the eyeshadows are creamy, blend-able, and beautiful. Oh, and it smells like chocolate.
  9. First Aid Beauty Eye Duty Triple Remedy – This product claims to erase dark circles, de-puff, and brighten your under-eye area, and I believe those claims whole-heartedly. So many people I know use (and love) this.
  10. Kat Von D Shade + Light Contour Palette – I feel like every brand out there is coming out with a contour palette as of lately, but this is the one that I keep hearing about again and again for being one that is worth the investment.
  11. Origins Clear Improvement Charcoal Mask – Charcoal works to draw toxins, dirt, and debris out from under your skin. It’s a good mask to try if you’re having problems with your skin.
  12. Too Faced Better Than Sex Mascara – I sent this to my sister in an Easter gift package, and she loves it. Also Taylor Swift loves it, which I know because I mean obviously I know what mascara Taylor Swift uses.

And there you have it. Are you planning on getting in on the sale? Lemme know!



To be a person in this world requires quite a lot of self control in all aspects of your life. You’re expected to not eat the entire pizza, to not say what’s actually on your mind, and to not fully acknowledge feelings of weakness. We’re supposed to always present the best version of ourselves to our peers, our family, our friends, our colleagues, to basically everyone. You’re supposed to listen to the bands that are cool, care about the things that you’ve been taught to care about, and lead a life that follows the timeline that’s been engrained into your mind ever since you stepped foot in a classroom when you were 5. And that can get strenuous when you’re just not feeling like the best version of yourself. You’re supposed to be constantly grateful for what you have, when all you really want is some Lucky Charms cereal and a Netflix marathon to drown out the world.



  1. Those people directly in front of you in line for the bathroom who go super speedily so it’s like you don’t even have to wait for the bathroom at ALL.
  2. People who like dogs.
  3. People who genuinely act interested when you talk about Taylor Swift’s latest accomplishments when really they are brainstorming ways to mute your vocal chords.
  4. Friendly flight attendants.
  5. People who dance at weddings.
  6. Those middle school friends who were still your friend even when you went through your braided pigtails phase.
  7. People who call you out when you’re acting above yourself or if you don’t actually look good in that outfit.
  8. People sitting next to you on airplanes who don’t force conversation upon you.
  9. People who enjoy breakfast food at all times of the day.
  10. People who don’t look at you like you are a psycho person when you tell them that you run a blog about your life.

And also people who got to the end of this list. Kudos to you.


Some Life Updatez

  • Still obsessed with Andrew McMahon’s album. Not planning on stopping any time soon.
  • I have recently decided that I like sitting on the floor to put my makeup on in the morning. There’s something therapeutic about it.
  • Yesterday Taylor Swift liked my post on Tumblr out of nowhere and I’m pretty sure I had mental breakdown while standing in line at Starbucks. Like, multi-system organ failure and the lot. Still emotionally unstable, to be honest….
  • I hate April Fool’s day. No, that is not an April Fool’s joke.
  • I need to take off my nail polish. (WOW, POINTLESS UPDATE THERE.)
  • Last week I took a SoulCycle class with a new teacher and I’d be lying if I said he didn’t remind me of Titus from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. And if you’ve watched Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, you know how exciting that is.
  • I SAW THE BEACH! I WALKED ON THE BEACH! I mean you probably already know this from the wedding pictures, but I hadn’t seen the beach since Hawaii and it was a long month and a half without staring at the vast ocean, you know? I just really loves beaches. They’re calming.
  • I am finally reading Divergent and it’s actually pretty good.
  • I don’t know why I felt the need to spell updates ‘updatez,’ but it happened and I’m just gonna go with it.

What’s new in your life? ANY FASCINATING THINGS I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT OUT?!? Sending lots of love and sparkles your way today.


A Wedding At The Beach

I remember the exact day that Lauren met Dan at The French Press in Santa Barbara, the phone call I got soon afterwards, and the fact that the rest was pretty much history from that day forward.

This past weekend, they made it official in the most beautifully intimate ceremony I’ve ever been to, and I feel so blessed that I was able to celebrate with them on their special day. It was super surreal that the wedding was at this one particular beach, because I spent the day with them at that same beach way back when they had first met, so to see them walking down the aisle in the same place was simply mind-boggling.

And lemme just tell you about this wedding….. Coffee bar. Pizza appetizers. Tea-themed tables. Ocean view. Cowboy boots. Country music. Swing dancing. It was one of those things where you start to miss it before it is even over. It was really such a beautiful celebration of two beautiful souls. Also, I have come to the conclusion that you haven’t truly become a California girl until you’re been to a wedding where groomsmen go surfing during the reception. Yes, that did happen.

Thank you Lauren & Dan for including me, and I’m sending you so much love as you embark on this next chapter in your life together.


Maybe It’s Maybelline: The New ‘Fit Me’ Line

So there I was, standing in the aisles of Target, contemplating to myself whether or not to get Maybelline’s newest foundation launch, the Fit Me. All of my deductive reasoning pointed to YES as I have loved basically every product Maybelline has released in recent years, so it would only make sense that I would love this product too.

I went with the Matte + Poreless formulation, and it’s matte without being drying. I apply it with my Sigma Flat Top Kabuki brush, and it gives a velvety finish such that you could probably get away without using setting powder, but I use a powder anyways.

I want to go out on a limb and say that this is one of the cheapest drugstore foundations out there? At the price point of $5.99, it basically costs less than your iced coffee & bagel at Starbucks. I got the shade 120 because it was the lightest shade that was still in stock, but it turned out to be a perfect match for me. If you’re wondering, the shade 120 is neutral-toned, not too yellow or too pink. Maybelline has a color matching guide on their website if you have no idea what shade you would be. In addition to the Matte + Poreless version, they also have a Dewy + Smooth formulation which is better for dry skin & for those who want more of glow.

On the down-side, it has a pour out disposal system, which can get messy if you’re not careful, and you only get 1oz of product, which seems small but I guess is pretty standard for drugstore foundations.

The Fit Me concealer is also lovely. It’s more creamy than liquidy, which I find to be very long-lasting and easy to blend. I saw a review comparing it to the NARS Creamy Concealer, but I haven’t tried that so I wouldn’t be able to confirm that.

Have you tried the new Maybelline Fit Me line? Are you going to? Let me know!


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